Here’s a short quiz based on some common grammar mistakes. Click here for a review, and then try this quiz. Scroll down for the answers.

1.  The door was open, we heard a woman scream.

2.  The Powells’ house is located on a busy downtown street.

3.  The Powells’ have lived there for five years.

4.  I set up a time to talk to he and she about the break-in.

5.  I walked up to the car, it looked abandoned.

ANSWERS

1.  The door was open. We heard a woman scream. OR The door was open; we heard a woman scream. [Sentences end with periods or semicolons, not commas. If you use a semicolon, lower-case the next letter unless it’s a capitalized name.]

2.  The Powells’ house is located on a busy downtown street. [Correct: Think house of the Powells (not Powell).]

3.  The Powells have lived there for five years. [No apostrophe: There’s no “of” idea.]

4.  I set up a time to talk to him and her about the break-in. [For any easy trick to get this right every time, read about the Thumb Rule here.]

5.  I walked up to the car. It looked abandoned. OR I walked up to the car; it looked abandoned. [Sentences should end with periods or semicolons, not commas. Here’s a handy rule of thumb: It starts a new sentence. Semicolons are followed by lower-case unless it’s a capitalized name.]

How did you do?

This short quiz will help you sharpen your writing skills. Answers are posted below.

Part I  Word Choice Exercise
Correct the errors in the sentences below. There can be more than one error in a sentence – or none.

1. The mayor was quiet surprised by the angry response to her speech.
2. We use to have more generous health insurance.
3. Despite his threats, Cooper didn’t pose any imminent danger.

Part 2 Better Sentences
Here are two excerpts from police reports. Rewrite these sentences to make them more appropriate for a modern police report. (Note that these are only short portions of police reports.)

1. I responded to 16 Winter Court. Upon arrival I made contact with Amanda Blocker.
2. As the cyclist continued on his way, I exited my patrol vehicle. I chased the man on foot, tackled him off his bike, and detained him after a brief struggle on the ground.

ANSWERS

Part I  Word Choice Exercise

1. The mayor was quite surprised by the angry response to her speech.
2. We used to have more generous health insurance. [Used to almost always needs a “d.”]
3. Despite his threats, Cooper didn’t pose any imminent danger.  [Correct. Imminent means “immediate.” Don’t confuse it with eminent, which means “famous” or “important.”]

Part 2  Better  Sentences

1. I talked to Amanda Blocker. [You already typed the date and address in appropriate spaces on your computer screen. Don’t waste time typing them again. And it’s obvious that you made contact with Amanda. How else could you have talked to her?]
2. The cyclist kept going. I left my patrol car and chased him. I tackled him, we struggled for a few minutes, and I brought him to the ground.  [Use plain, ordinary English. Left is a better choice than exited. Since you weren’t driving when you chased the man, there’s no need to say “on foot.” Tackled him is a better description of what you did than detained him. You don’t need “off his bike.”]

How did you do?

On February 10, Minnesota Congresswoman Angie Craig defended herself against an assailant by throwing a cup of hot coffee at him. Craig, a Democrat, was bruised but not seriously harmed in the attack. The suspect was later arrested and charged.

You can read the story and the police report at this link: https://nypost.com/2023/02/10/msnbc-doxxed-congresswoman-who-was-assaulted-in-her-dc-apartment/. (MSNBC broadcast the police report, which included Craig’s address. That breach of privacy is a violation of MSNBC’s policies.)

I always encourage officers and trainees to read and evaluate police reports. That’s an excellent way to sharpen your own writing skills.

Here’s the Craig police report. If you were an administrator, what comments would you make? You can read my thoughts below.

My comments:
This report needs to be more efficient. Here’s my version:

C1 said she saw S1 in the lobby. He was behaving erratically. She thought he might be under the influence of a drug.

She said “Good morning” to him and got into the elevator. S1 followed her and started doing pushups. Then he punched her on her chin and grabbed her neck.

Ca tossed her hot coffee at him and ran out of the elevator.

Officers searched the basement level parking lot but didn’t find him.

My version is more than a third shorter. Officers are busy men and women. Stress is a huge problem in law enforcement today. One step every agency could take immediately is to show officers how to do paperwork more efficiently. The Angie Craig police report is a good example.

Photo by Lorie Shaull

On January 17, 2023, police in Raleigh, North Carolina, tased a suspect who died minutes later.

You can read the story, including the police report, at this link: https://abc11.com/5-day-report-death-in-custody-raleigh-police-darryl-williams/12727658/

I’ve posted part of the police report below . (Because the case is under investigation, I’m not going to comment on the tasing.)

Imagine for a moment that you were a police administrator. How would you assess the quality of the writing?

Robinson approached a vehicle in the parking lot. He noticed two people in the front of the vehicle, and the passenger opened their door as he approached. Inside the car, Robinson said he saw bottles of alcohol and marijuana. He asked both people to get out of the car, and he radioed for assistance.

Robinson said he found a folded-up dollar bill in the pocket of the man who was sitting in the driver’s seat of the vehicle, later identified as Darryl Williams. The dollar bill appeared to have cocaine on it, so Robinson decided to arrest Williams on possession of a controlled substance.

When Robinson told Williams to put his hands behind his back, Williams resisted. Other officers then arrived to help try and put Williams into handcuffs.

What did you think?

Here’s my assessment: the writing is excellent. Sentences are short, clear, and natural. There’s no police jargon and no passive voice.

I would question only one part of one sentence: “The dollar bill appeared to have cocaine on it.” I would prefer a more detailed description: “Officer Robinson saw white powder on the dollar bill.”

Photo Courtesy of Xchangerjunior
CC License

And here are active-voice rewrites of the passive-voice sentences:

1.  The landlord replaced the roof two years ago.

4.  You can find the key under a rock to the left of the front door.

How did you do?

Taking notes that are accurate and complete is an important step when you’re preparing a report. Here are a few tips:

1.  Be prepared.

Of course you have writing paper (and perhaps a laptop). But what if you jump out of your patrol car to deal with an emergency? It’s embarrassing to be caught without writing materials. Go to the Dollar Store and buy a few tiny notebooks. Keep one in a pocket, along with a couple of pens or pencils.

2.  Think about categories.

Train yourself to think in five categories: yourself, victims, witnesses, suspects, evidence, and disposition. You won’t necessarily organize your report in these categories. But thinking about them will ensure that you don’t overlook anything important.

3.  Think about the type of report you’ll be rewriting.

There are four basic types of reports that you’ll write over and over.) Click here to learn more about them.) If you’ve thoroughly familiarized yourself with the types of reports and their special requirements, you’re more likely to cover every angle. For example, a Type 4 report (officer sets the case in motion) may have to deal with probable cause issues in some detail.

3.  Control the interview.

Talking to witnesses, suspects, and victims can present challenges: Stress levels are likely to be high, and you may be listening to a jumble of relevant and irrelevant information.

One useful practice is to deal with emotions first. Reassure the person you’re talking to (“You’re safe” or “We’ve got the situation under control”). Then explain that you need the person’s help in order to follow up. If you’re calm and professional, the person who’s talking is more likely to cooperate and answer your questions. Don’t hesitate to break in, gently, if a witness goes off on a tangent.

4.  Record the information promptly and thoroughly.

Don’t rely on your memory to add details later. It’s embarrassing to be caught with an inaccurate or incomplete report. Discipline yourself to write a complete set of notes as soon as possible.

This short quiz will help you sharpen your writing skills. Answers are posted below.

Part 1  Make corrections and improvements where needed. (Some sentences may not need changes.)

1. The children’s mother said she was napping while the children were playing outdoors.

2. Samuels expressed that he and his wife had been arguing and drinking.

3. John and me searched the apartment but didn’t find any weapons.

Part 2

Officer Joan Littleton just graduated from the academy. She’s eager to impress the sergeant who will be reading her reports. What advice would you give her? You may choose more than one answer.

a)  Start most sentences in your reports with a person, place, or thing.
b)  Use sophisticated word choices and sentence structure that will impress your supervisor.
c)  Use passive voice to ensure that your report is objective.

ANSWERS

Part 1

√ 1. The children’s mother said she was napping while the children were playing outdoors.

X 2. Samuels expressed that he and his wife had been arguing and drinking.

X 3. John and me searched the apartment but didn’t find any weapons.

Part 2

Officer Joan Littleton just graduated from the academy. She’s eager to impress the sergeant who will be reading her reports. What advice would you give her? You may choose more than one answer.

√ a)  Start most sentences in your reports with a person, place, or thing.
X b)  Use sophisticated word choices and sentence structure that will impress your supervisor.
X c)  Use passive voice to ensure that your report is objective.

Many officers say that as their experience grows, so does their intuition. Out of nowhere comes a warning, a suspicion, or a hunch that can alert them to danger or help solve a crime.

Sometimes there’s a dramatic flash; at other times it’s a gut feeling or a hunch. Some officers even say that they owe their lives to a sudden intuition that something serious was about to happen.

But when the incident is over and the suspect has been apprehended, there’s a report to be written – and a problem.

Hunches, intuition, and experience can’t be documented:

I had a hunch…
He looked suspicious…
I could tell that he was about to…

As Sgt. Joe Friday used to say: “Just the facts, Ma’am.”

So what should you put into your police report?  You need to figure out what triggered your intuition.

For example, you’re walking along a sidewalk on your way to a local business to investigate a theft. Suddenly you  have a hunch that one of the passersby is up to no good.

If you’re observant (and all cops are!), and you’ve practiced recalling incidents, you’re likely to come up with the detail that triggered your intuition. That guy was dressed too warmly!

In your everyday life – both on and off duty – practice paying attention and recalling details later. Train your mind to remember. You’ll be glad you did!

Herschel Walker is a former candidate for the US Senate and a renowned football player. Back in 2001, police filed a police report about Walker’s involvement in a domestic dispute. You can read more (including the entire report) here.

The police report is thorough, objective, and…wordy. (Click the link to see what you think of it.)

Suppose you were the reporting officer. Your shift is at least 8 hours long – perhaps 12 hours. There’s a lot to do. Put a √ before the information you would include in your report. Put an X before anything you would omit:

___I went to the address listed on the form I filled out.
___Walker’s girlfriend invited me to come in and talk to her.
___She and Walker had an off-and-on relationship for 20 years.

Here are my answers:
X I went to the address listed on the form I filled out.
X Walker’s girlfriend invited me to come in and talk to her.
√ She and Walker had an off-and-on relationship for 20 years.

It’s not just that the officer wasted time. Everyone who has read that report (which is still of interest, more than 20 years later) wasted precious minutes reading information that was obvious.

Of course the officer went to the listed address. Where else would he have gone? Of course Walker’s girlfriend agreed to talk to the officer: everything she said is right there in the report!

I often talk to police administrators who shake their heads over the wordiness in police writing. But when I ask what they’re doing about it, they look surprised. Isn’t it the officer’s problem?

No. It’s a training problem, and the solution is a simple one:

1. Emphasize critical thinking. That means teaching cadets (and reminding sworn officers) the difference between information that matters – and information that doesn’t.
2. Refuse to accept wordy reports. Nobody enjoys writing police reports! And nobody wants to rewrite a report. You get what you ask for!

Photo by Michael Kaplan, CC License