Because Tom Brady has been in the news so often lately, I thought it might be fun (and useful!) to look back at a 2017 police report involving one of his jerseys.

Back then, Brady was quarterback for the New England Patriots. After the Super Bowl, he realized that his game jersey was missing from his locker in the NRG Stadium in Houston. The theft made news because Brady told police that the jersey was worth half a million dollars. (You can download the police report here: https://htv-prod-media.s3.amazonaws.com/files/brady-jersey-stolen-1487693415.pdf)

What interests us today, however, are the apostrophes. Here’s the summary from the police report:

On 2/05/17, the City of Houston hosted Super Bowl LI In the NRG Stadium. Shortly after winning the game, New England Patriot’s quarterback Tom Brady noticed his game jersey missing from his locker in the Patriot’s designated locker room.

Would you say that Brady was the Patriot’s quarterback – or the Patriots‘ quarterback? The answer is easy if you ask yourself whether you’re talking about the Patriots – or the Patriot.

The team is the Patriots, right? (Not the Patriot!) So it’s the Patriots’ quarterback and the Patriots’ designated locker room. The apostrophes in the report need to be corrected:

Shortly after winning the game, New England Patriots‘ quarterback Tom Brady noticed his game jersey missing from his locker in the Patriots‘ designated locker room.

Although apostrophes befuddle many writers, they’re not difficult at all. Just write the word or name, and put an apostrophe after the last letter.

Tom Brady is the quarterback of the Patriots.

Patriots

Patriots’

the Patriots’ quarterback

Let’s try another one: the victory of Tom Brady.

Tom Brady

Brady’s

Tom Brady’s victory

Here’s one more: Cyrus Jones is the cornerback for the Patriots. Let’s try the jersey of Cyrus Jones.

Cyrus Jones

Cyrus Jones’

Cyrus Jones’ jersey OR Cyrus Jones‘s jersey

Looking for the last letter of the word or name will help you place the apostrophe correctly every time.

For more practice with apostrophes, click here.

                                                  Courtesy of Mike Lizzi

Today’s quiz has a different format. It’s based on writing mistakes that often appear in professional writing, including police reports. Try the quiz yourself, and then check your answers below.

Here’s a short quiz about some common writing mistakes. Scroll down for the answers.  (But do try the quiz yourself first!) Warning: some sentences have two mistakes; others have none.

1. Langford said nothing at first, then she slowly told me about the fight.

2. Carlson admitted he was quick to loose his temper.

3. The Smith’s refused to answer my questions about the screaming there neighbors heard.

4. Wiley pointed to back yard and said, “In the shed.”

5. Barton said that the purse was her’s, and she wasn’t going to give it to Farrell.

6. The department is preparing for its first accreditation visit.

Here are the answers:

X  1. Langford said nothing at first. Then she slowly told me about the fight.  (Use a period and a capital letter. You can’t join two sentences with then.)

X  2. Carlson admitted he was quick to lose his temper.  (Loose means “not tight,” and it rhymes with moose. The word needed here is lose.)

X  3.The Smiths refused to answer my questions about the screaming their neighbors heard.  (The Smiths don’t own anything in this sentence. Omit the apostrophe: Smiths is correct. And be careful not to confuse there/they’re/their. This sentence requires their.)

✓ 4. Wiley pointed to back yard and said, “In the shed.”  CORRECT (In the US, periods and commas always go inside quotation marks.)

X 5. Barton said that the purse was hers, and she wasn’t going to give it to Farrell.  (Don’t use an apostrophe with his, hers, ours, yours, and theirs.)

✓ 6. The department is preparing for its first accreditation visit.  CORRECT (There’s no apostrophe in its. Here’s how to tell: try plugging his into the sentence.  “The department is preparing for his first accreditation visit.” It’s – with an apostrophe – means it is: “I think it’s time to leave.”)

How did you do? And – more important – did you catch any errors that tend to slip into your reports?

Can you spot the common mistakes in these sentences? (Answers are provided below.)

1.  If you have alot to do next week, we can postpone the project.

2.  Superintendent Jones asked Officer Payne and me to meet with him tomorrow morning.

3.  There’s several messages from reporters who want to talk with you.

4.  The visiting room is busy today, it was unusually quiet yesterday, though.

5.  The staff canteen is expanding its hours of operation.

ANSWERS

X 1. If you have a lot to do next week, we can postpone the project. (A lot is always two words – no exceptions.)

√2.  Superintendent Jones asked Officer Payne and me to meet with him tomorrow morning.  (Think: “asked…me” = “asked Officer Payne and me.” To learn more, click here.)

X 3.  There are several messages from reporters who want to talk with you.  (Think: “several messages are there” = “there are several messages.” To learn more, click here.)

X 4.  The visiting room is busy today. It was unusually quiet yesterday, though. (Any idea that starts with it is a sentence: Use a period and a capital letter.)

√ 5.  The staff canteen is expanding its hours of operation. (The possessive of it has no apostrophe – compare his, another possessive word with no apostrophe. To learn more, click here.)

How did you do?

Police officers sometimes wonder whether their police reports matter. Does all that time and effort ever make a difference?

A recent police report confirms that sometimes, at least, the answer is an emphatic yes. On October 23, Javier Jesus Lopez was arrested in Hialeah, Florida, for aggravated battery and causing great bodily harm.

His victim was a Republican campaign worker who claimed that the attack was politically motivated. Soon Republican Senator Marco Rubio went public with a similar complaint.

But here’s the thing: politics isn’t mentioned anywhere in the police report. Neither the victim nor the attacker talked about politics when police arrived. (Click the link below to read the report yourself.)

There’s an old (and wise) maxim about police reports that goes like this: “If it’s not written down, it didn’t happen.” It’s a useful principle for anyone who writes reports.

The report is worth reading even if you’re not looking for political content. The officer is obviously a skillful writer. Sentences are clear, precise, and professional.

But – as I see so often in police reports – two criminal justice principles have been overlooked.

The first is brevity. Take a look at this sentence:

Ultimately, all parties were separated by neighbors who had overheard the commotion and fighting. (14 words)

Here’s my version: 

Neighbors heard the fighting. They separated Monzon and Lopez. (9 words)

My sentence is one-third shorter – without losing a single piece of information. (I also used active voice – they separated – rather than passive – were separated.)

Second, the report lapsed into passive voice at the end: “The defendant was transported to the Hialeah Main Police Station.” Who transported him? Suppose that later on there are questions about what happened during that trip. It would be important to know who did the driving, wouldn’t it? And why “the defendant”? Just write Lopez.

I’m endlessly amazed that police leaders don’t step in when officers overwrite their reports. Everybody saves time when reports are crisp and to the point. (What would your shifts be like if you cut your writing time by a third?)

Police Make Second Arrest in Brutal Beating of Rubio Canvasser; Victim Maintains Attack Was Politically Motivated

Robert Crimo III is the 18-year-old man who confessed to the July 4 killings in Highland Park, Illinois. Three years ago police officers went to his home to check on him. A relative had told police that shooter Robert had threatened to “kill everyone” in his family. The incident report about the visit mentioned “a collection of knives in his bedroom.”

That report is a good reminder that police reports never go away! Something that seems routine at the time can become front page news later on.

I have some thoughts about the report (which is posted below). Overall this is an excellent report: it’s clearly written and thorough. The officers recorded a great deal of useful information.

• The report could be more efficient. After you fill in the spaces on your laptop with  the date, time, and other background information, don’t repeat it.
• “Upon making contact” is unnecessary. How else would you have talked to them? The second paragraph should begin with “Robert admitted to being depressed on Monday 9/02/19 and having a history of drug abuse.”
• “Robert was not forthcoming as to the language that he used on Monday” is not specific enough. Was he silent? Did he say that he wasn’t going to answer any questions?
• Here’s another sentence that should be rewritten: “After speaking to Robert E. Crimo III’s father, it was learned that the collection of knives belonged to him.” 
• This is my version: “Crimo’s father told us that the knives belonged to him.”
  Police officers are busy – and so are the people who read reports!

Develop the habit of making every report both complete and concise. Effective reports are a great way to showcase your professionalism.

Gordon Graham, founder of Lexapro, provides a wide range of resources for public safety officers. Here’s a short  (and excellent) video he posted recently about report writing:

https://www.lexipol.com/resources/todays-tips/effective-public-safety-report-preparation/

My thanks to Coach Sokolove from Field Training Associates for providing this link.

This short quiz will help you sharpen your writing skills. Answers are posted below.

Part 1  Correct the English usage errors in these sentences. (Some sentences may not have errors.)

a)  The homeowner asked Officer Cooper and me to check on the elderly woman who lived next door.
b)  The childrens’ aunt forgot to pick them up after school.
c)  The EMT told Forster to breath deeply and exhale into a paper bag.

Part 2  Choose the best answer for each question below

1) What important information is missing from the sentences below?

a)  The scraps of cloth and coffee cup were logged into the evidence room.
b)  I patted down Rogers because he was acting suspiciously.

2)  Which sentence is appropriate for a police report? Choose one answer.

a)  Davis expressed that he had a doctor’s appointment at three o’clock.
b)  I advised Lydia to see a doctor about the cut on her arm.
c)  Johnson advised me that the driver failed to stop when the light turned red.

ANSWERS

Part 1 

√ a)  The homeowner asked Officer Cooper and me to check on the elderly woman who lived next door. [Think: “asked me” – so it’s “asked Officer Cooper and me.” Shortening a sentence this way can often help you choose the correct word quickly.]
X b)  The children’s aunt forgot to pick them up after school.  [The apostrophe goes after the last letter of the word or name. Children ends with “n,” so it’s children’s aunt.]
X c)  The EMT told Forster to breathe deeply and exhale into a paper bag. [A breath is a thing. Breathe is an action.]

Part 2  Choose the best answer for each question below

1) What important information is missing from the sentences below?

a)  The scraps of cloth and coffee cup were logged into the evidence room.  [Who logged in the cloth and the cup? Use active voice: “I logged the scraps of cloth and coffee cup into the evidence room.”]
b)  I patted down Rogers because he was acting suspiciously.  [You didn’t provide probable cause to search Rogers. What behavior – specifically – made you suspicious? For example, perhaps Rogers looked over his shoulder every two or three steps.]

2)  Which sentence is appropriate for a police report? Choose one answer.

X a)  Davis expressed said that he had a doctor’s appointment at three o’clock. [Use simple, normal English.]
√ b)  I advised Lydia to see a doctor about the cut on her arm.  [Advised is correct because you’re counseling her.]
X c)  Johnson advised told me that the driver failed to stop when the light turned red. [Save advised for giving counsel. Use simple, normal English: told.]

How did you do?